No no...I am Bringing Sexy Back...

Sundays are the days where I take a brief sabbatical from politics and do a miscellaneous piece. This week, I have taken a look at the top forty chart (pop) to get a vibe of what really moves our culture.

 

5. In the number five spot is Nelly Furtado, feat. Timbaland with "Promiscuous," as you can probably tell, Nelly does not get promiscuous because of the name...

 

This song is a beautiful love ballad from one whore, err promiscuous boy, to another, promiscuous girl (or gurl). It will make you laugh, it will make you cry, and afterwards you may just want to get an appointment to make sure you didn't catch anything from either one!

 

4. Gnarls Barkley, "Crazy": Well, after the fifteenth time you have heard this song, it will drive you Crazzzzzzzeeeee. Catchy tune, at first (emphasis on at first), but after that, you find yourself asking "have you lost your mind."

 

3. The Pussycat Dolls, featuring Snoop Dogg, "Buttons": Ok, one has to question Snoop Dogg for wanting to be featured in a song (if you can really call it that) about a "man" who doesn't want to help a female out of her clothes...hmmmm...maybe Snoop needs some Vi-izzle? Ok, seriously, this song is just about taking clothes off...and there was much rejoicing in the land...yeah!

 

2. Fergie, "London Bridge": With lines like, "I am such a lady, but I'm dacin' like a ho," what is not to like here. I really think that Fergie suffers from split personalities... Take this sequence for example, following each line is the English translation:

 

"And I'm going to get up out my face"- Umm, yeah, I am confused

 

"Before I turn around and spray your a** with mace"- I hate you

 

"My lips make you want to have a taste"- I love you

 

"You got that? I got the bass"- Let's get back to the me being a ho part...

 

Needless to say, Fergie! You had me at "I'm dancin' like a ho."

 

AND NUMBER ONE- Justin Timberlake, "SexyBack": While this is aesthetically a catchy beat song, the lyrics sound like a third grader (foul mouthed mind you) wrote it. Such classic and endearing lines like, "I'm bringin' sexy back, them other boys don't know how to act." First, this is Justin Timberlake we are talking about right. I mean he finally goes through puberty in his twenties, gets some facial hair and decides that he will bring the sexy back, that somehow has been missing all this time. So, that is great, so what is "sexy" to Justin you may be asking yourself? He likes to be beat into submission "I'll let you whip me if I misbehave" and he likes hips, "Look at those hips" besides that all I hear is him saying he is going to steal other guys' chicks who happen to like maternal copulation. "You motherf***ers watch how I attack, If that's your girl, better watch your back."

 

Well, there it is the top five in the United States' pop world. You know, with songs like these who really needs to care about petty things like relationships, abstinence, or even politics. I mean, obviously, the greatest attribute anyone can have is to bring sexy back which probably involves going down (of course I mean like a London Bridge you sick minded person), being promiscuous, crazy, or even dancin' like a ho. It is a wonder that some people think we are oversexed... You know, I think when we actually start respecting females for a little more than their bodies, maybe just maybe, we can truly TRULY start bringing sexy back. Until then...I guess go on "be bold wit it" is our favorite pastime.